Empty.

I stood in the pouring rain, looking down the dark and empty street. My mind was blank and my body was shivering as every inch of me got heavier by the second. I couldn't hear anything but the rain falling, I couldn't think about anything, and I couldn't feel anything but the weight on my heart. I felt lost, like I had no will, or reason, to live. Like everything I had ever known had been stolen from me, like an old lady's handbag torn from her arm by a thief. Except my thief was nothing of the sort...in fact, he was everything. He was everything I'd ever wanted and more. He had been what gave me reason, what gave me strength to stand up and be the person I wasn't any longer. He fulfilled me. And as crazy as it sounds, I still loved him. Even though he had been with me for so long and been my fortress in the crossfire. Even though he had held my face in his hands and said to me that he did not love me. Even though he had taken all that had ever meant anything to me and thrown it in the back of his car and in the back of his mind, only to drive away and leave me standing here in the rain, dying. I still loved him...every single inch of him. It doesn't matter what he's done to me, or what he hasn't done. I loved him. But what was I to do? A girl with shattered hopes and dreams and all the love in my heart in the palm of someone's hand, not being used, standing clueless in the pouring rain? Who did I have to fall back on, to catch whatever was left of me and not letting me fall into this dark hole of despair that grew closer every minute? I wouldn't do anything. I was just a mere shell, nothing left inside to do anything with. Even still, after he had left me, I would always be waiting with open arms. Nothing would change that. I loved him so much...and would never stop. No matter how much it hurt me. At that moment, my thoughts were interrupted by the slop of my cold and lifeless body on the watery pavement. I didn't feel it; I wouldn't have know I had fallen if I hadn't seen the jar in my vision as the empty street disappeared. Was I dead? Had I my knees given out on me? I didn't know. So, I laid there, staring up to the starry blue sky, and cried. I no longer existed, it felt. I was gone.